Monday, March 3, 2008

I've found my self stuck in the middle of a big giant "WTF". I'm often in these kind of situations. Which is only because of the type of person I am. I'm fine with it... But what I'm not fine with is people's expectations of me.

Everyone (really everyone) is coming to me for answers. Answers I don't have. I don't know why they're doing that. I don't know why she's doing this. I don't know why he's been like that. I don't know. I'm not really sure why everyone is expecting me to know. I'm also not really sure why everyone is expecting these mega changes, with out actually putting in the effort. Believe it or not, every change requires effort from all. Everything is fucking give and take. and I don't know why people expect to continue in the same path, and have things so different than before. When we've all been wrong, and at one point we have all been, we all need to do something differently. I wish more people would realize this in life. Oh, and changes do not just count as admitting there's a problem. You actually have to go on and make a difference.

Not everyone deals with these things well. I'm one of those people. I'm taking every little step I can, and I know I can be doing better, but it's still hard. I'm confused, and I know that my best isn't enough, But I'd hope it's better than the nothing I could be giving.

On a brighter note: I've been taking Day & Nyquil. I really love it a lot.

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